Best of Craigslist: Phish Miami

Photo from MerrySwankster

This installment of best of CL features the freaks of Miami, the few that posted decent ads anyhow.

Don't call me wook, I'll call you. Have a threesome with married people. Book your band for an "after-show" to ensure getting laid. Get a phish related job for the run. Write about it.

Dirty wook at Phish show 12/31

Date: 2010-01-03, 8:17PM EST

To the dirty wook loser in section 119 at that was all spun out and trying to grab on me while I was just trying to groove to the crunchy beats. You were so pathetic, I figured you'd be trying to find me somehow. So, if you find this, please do NOT try to contact me.

In Town Seeing Phish! - mw4w - 3039 (South Beach )
Date: 2009-12-06, 10:22PM EST

We are a clean, kind, married couple who will be staying near South Beach in the days leading up to the New Year, and are looking for someone to play with while we are in town. She is a bi-experienced red-head, fit, voluptuous and orgasmic, and he is a gentle, handsome, healthy, laid-back guy. We are new to guests in the bedroom, but are a happy couple with a great sex life, and like the idea of another soft body to pet, massage and share the love with. We will need to get together during the day or late, LATE at night, since our evenings will be spent at the shows. Please be healthy, lovely, drama-free and between 25 and 40. Thank you!

Jam Band (Miami)
Date: 2009-12-15, 5:55PM EST
Reply to: gigs-nfkrx-1511833580@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

We are looking for a band to play for free at our lounge after the Phish concert at American Airlines Arena for 12/28 thru 12/31. Our restaurant is located at 62 NE 14th St. We would feed band for free as well as provide a healthy bar tab!

Get a job as a concession stand worker

Some dude's creative writing about a chick he "met" at AAA

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